8/7/06

A Tour of Home

Tim Lantz is moving to Normal, Illinois, tomorrow. His Web site is timlantz.com.

Jack Clemmits: What are you doing in this town?

Tim Lantz: My great-grandfather rarely took showers. He would also wear the same pair of long underwear for months at a time. Eventually the pair would start to disintegrate, so he'd just put on a new pair and let the old continue to disintegrate underneath. He did this for most of his adult life.

J. C.: Where did you attend school?

T. L.: My father always let my brother and me do the skies in his paintings.

J. C.: You speak and write German, correct?

T. L.: After a woman had finished writing a check, she put it in her mouth and held up two fingers toward me. When I started double bagging her groceries, she asked, "How did you know I wanted them double bagged?" Why'd she do all that if she didn't think she'd be understood?

J. C.: So you also translate then?

T. L.: The first time I ever wished I knew sign language was when I walked in on my deaf great-aunt using the bathroom.

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